Tuesday, February 17, 2009

Things that happen.

While teaching kickboxing last night, something flung onto the floor while we were busting out some hitch kicks. I looked down and realized it was Sawyer's sock. This is the second time this sort of thing has happened to me. Last time, it was a pair of my own underwear while walking across a crowded living room at a friend's get together. I think I need to shake out my clothes after I pull them out of the dryer.

While half laying on Geoff and watching T.V. I asked him if I was too heavy. He went into this whole thing about how to never ask guys that and no one would really ever get the truth and blah, blah, blah. I figured he would quickly reply, "NO, NO WAY!!", so I could say, "Well, my left hand is resting on you and with all these diamonds, well, you know, I thought the weight would be crushing to your chest!" That joke when right down the toilet. MEN: Just say NO, not all of us mean to depreciate ourselves, sometimes we are just being funny... then you ruin it. He totally thinks I'm fat.

My Mac currently says it has ten hours of battery time. My Mac is on crack.

On the topic of fatness. I'm losing weight at alarming rates. It's actually getting annoying and I am not doing it on purpose. I keep having to buy new stuff because NOTHING fits. I wear the same thing over and over again because I can't keep buying clothes, it's stupid and I'm not good at it. If I hit 105 I'm going to start eating lard.

My skiing skills are starting to diminish. This can't happen. I am pretty sure that the Olympic Recruiter has his (or her?) eyes on me and totally stalks my ski trips. I didn't do any jumps yesterday and only did a blue/black run. Not even full black. What is the U.S.A. going to do without me on their team? I've got to get better... then again, I didn't drink at all yesterday, and we all know, beer makes EVERYTHING better.

I've never seen such wussy cab drivers like the cab drivers here. I live downtown and get to see bad driving first hand on a daily basis, I just didn't expect the most timid drivers to be the ones behind the wheel of a taxi/cab. Grow some... and take a little field trip to N.Y.C. and learn what real driving is like because frankly, I'm sick of passing you.

Point is, shake out your clothes, don't ask a man if you are fat (even if you are doing it as a joke), and feel free to race the taxi drivers here- you will always win.

Peace!

3 comments:

Juliana said...

I love you random friend. I think the skinnier we get the fatter we feel. What the EFF is up with that??!

Guys do not know how to answer questions correctly they just don't. We have sons and we can teach them this.

fallgirly said...

Ok, I hate people that say they're losing weight and they don't know how. IMPOSSIBLE! So spill it sister. What are you doing post baby that you weren't doing pre??? I need to know so I can do it too!

Unknown said...

Autumn: The only thing I do is drink more, eat more and exercise less. It doesn't equal up, right?!?!