Sooooo when it came to planning Sawyer and Charlotte's birthday I thought pretty hard about the whole gift thing in advance. We live up in the mountains, gas is expensive and I'm am just sooo happy for someone to show their love for us by simply showing up. We don't need presents. Then I remember when I was younger and had a birthday party. I loved seeing my friends, I loved the cake, I loved the party and, well, I loved the presents. It didn't matter what it was, you could of wrapped up an old pair of shorts and I was happy unwrapping something. Friends were not higher on my list if they had a better present than someone else. I liked the shiny paper and it was just another FUN thing to add to birthday festivities. I decided that I wasn't going to not allow presents but we would also open up presents after the party so no one felt weird if they didn't bring a present or if one present wasn't as great as another. Again, I'm soooo weird when giving gifts and I really DON'T expect them but I also don't want to take that part away from my son and daughter.
Decision made, we allow gifts but don't open them at the party.
Now I'm faced with another challenge, the gifts with no name.
When Charlotte was born, a friend sent me the most adorable outfit. I LOVE it!!! The outfit included the cutest tutu skirt and I have taken many pictures of Charlotte dressed in the cuteness. I asked this friend for her address several times and have not heard back. To this day, I have nightmares about her hating me because I didn't send her a thank you card.
So here we are today, I'm sending out the thank you cards and wonder what to do with the gifts that did not have a name attached. I don't want to ask, "Hey did you give us this?" because if they didn't give us anything I don't want them to feel strange about it. Again, I still think it's sooooo freakin' amazing that they came and THAT in itself is the best present you can give us but I also want to show my gratitude toward the nameless gifts.
What do you guys think? what would you guys do?
On another note, if you were the person that gave a gift but didn't get a thank you, do you mention it to the person? Example: Three weddings in a row, we didn't get thank you cards for our gifts. I don't EXPECT a card but the gifts were ordered online and I just want to make sure the couples received the gift but don't want them to feel like I'm implying anything by asking so. Make sense?
So yeah, see why I'm all weird when it comes to gift giving? You can seriously insult someone just because you were trying to be grateful. Ahhhhh! Give me your advice!
7 comments:
Ahhh thank you cards. I was never brought up writing out thank you cards. I have an extremely small family, and was expected to make thank you calls...but as I've gotten older I've formed an opinion about them and have sort of forced myself to write them out for like...everything. I'm trying to get better about sending them out for events I put on or participate in (like I threw an Arbonne party and a few weeks later I thought it would be nice to send thank yous, but it was too late). Part of it is my love of sending snail mail (who doesn't love getting notes in the mail?) and the other part of it is my never ending quest to have perfect etiquette.
So what would I do in your case? Do you have a list of everyone who came? Send them ALL thank you cards. You said yourself it's a truck to get up to your home, not to mention the time people took out to spend the afternoon celebrating with you and your family. Drop everyone a quick note saying, "thanks for coming we were glad to see you, blah blah blah". Yes, it's nice to mention a specific gift, but if they didn't include a card or even a tag....what do they expect?
With that said, I DO get annoyed when I don't get a thank you card. Particularly for really formal things where I drop serious cash on the person like weddings, baby showers, graduations, christenings etc. A birthday party I can give a pass to just don't text me four months later at 11pm telling me you're sorry you forgot to send a card but thanks for the gift...yes, that's happened to me!
Good luck with whatever you decide and remember you can even get little postcard type thank yous to cut down on postage costs!
i make a generic thank you card using photos of G from the party and just say thank you so much for celebrating with me.
I'm a HORRIBLE thank you card giver. I would rather never receive a gift than have to send a thank you card. That's horrible, but true. I never expect a thank you card...ever. I just like getting together and having fun. So, I'm of no help at all. ;)
I went to a birthday party for a friend's daughter recently where the presents weren't opened in front of the guests, and I considered it a let down. (Forgive me if I've told you this story before; I feel like I've commented on a blog about this already, I'm just not sure if it was yours.) I understand your feelings of not wanting anyone to feel guilty about bad or non-existent presents, but what about the people who thought really hard about their gifts? I really wanted to see the girl open her Wheely Bug! That being said, I personally always open gifts in front of guests, so then I can ask who gave items that don't have cards. As it goes in your situation, I agree with the idea of sending generic thank you notes to all guests. ^_^
I think a thank you is always appropriate- I probably overuse thank you notes! And I'd think opening the presents while the guests were there would bypass the no name attached gifts. Which btw who doesn't put a name on a gift?! I HATE that!
I have friends who send thank you cards for EVERYTHING. One even sent me a card because they spent the weekend at our house. This made me feel like they only stayed with me because it was cheaper than a hotel, or something. SO. The cards can go too far. And when I get them, I usually throw them away. But, I love the little postcards with the picture of the kids that goes to everyone. I put those on my fridge. So I'd go with that.
I like to write...I'm a blogger, right? :)
So, I like to write thank you notes. I also like receiving them; not because I gave a gift - more so, because I'm hearing from someone and it makes me think of them.
A little sentimental, huh?
But, it doesn't matter if I don't get a thank you.
And you're right about the online orders. You're always wondering if the gift was delivered.
We don't always get it right with the gifts, notes, the mysteries, etc. I say, just do what you can and don't stress over the rest.
If you must know who gave the mystery gift, get one of the people who gave you a gift to ask around for you.
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