(Recap: I am over being pissy and NO I'm NOT pregnant. Just an early, uhhh, girl cycle. Joy. If my mother in law was not here, it would of been way worse. This week end up being totally awesome and next time we buy her a ticket here, we aren't letting her go back home. Did I tell you she was in town? Bliss.)
Moving on with my next problem.
I have this friend. She is like totally two-faced. She's all, "Holly, I like you, you are funny. we are MEANT to hang out, we are BEST FRIENDS" and then when I let my guard down, she stabs me in the back.
WTF?
But when I had to go nine months without hanging out with her, it's kind of hard to let her go so easily.
Now I LOVE to hang out with her. Especially with salt around the rim (closing my eyes remembering our times together), I hold her gently and take sips. I let my husband hold her and try a taste.
But just when we get all cozy, I noticed my girl Margarita is attaching herself onto my thighs and it's NOT PRETTY!
What a B-word, right?!?!
Sooo, I'm fatty-boom-batty and I need to lose a few pounds and kick Marg to the curb for a bit. I can't be all jiggly when teaching a kickboxing class.
I.
Just.
Can't.
So, REALLY, I'm thinking about doing a cleanse of some sort. You know, one of those eat like nothing and then the next time you drink, you only need one drink to feel tipsy and not six?
But my REAL question is, when do Is start? Now, with a large pack of Sam Adams in the fridge?
Or AFTER my hubby and I drink them?
Maybe Sam isn't as two-faced as Marg? You guys know all the answers so YOU decide... because I'm five and can't decide for myself.
And you guys are pretty and I only listen to pretty people.
10 comments:
I'm currently taking a 9 month break from Marg and her friends. I'm ready to reunite come this June; it will be a much longed for reunion.
Def wait until after the Sam is gone. You don't want him to feel neglected.
i think you should switch to straight tequila - it doesnt attach to the hips quite as easily
No alcohol for me since I was pregnant with my first child 16 years ago...well maybe a sip or two at a wedding.
Anyway, between 3 pregnancies and 4 years of combined breastfeeding...I found out I could live without it.
I know...this doesn't help you.
Yep...boring... LOL
Good Luck!
I have no advice. But I'm not one to waste food/drink in the house.
Also, thanks for calling us pretty. Takes one to know one.
HA HA! I thought my dad only said "fatty-boom-batty". To our fat cats; not me. ;)
My girlfriend Emily did a cleanse - I'll find out what she did.
And I vote for drinking the beers first. While weeping salty tears into them.
I'm pretty sure it's impossible and possibly even illegal to go on any sort of diet and/or cleanse while there is perfectly good booze in the house.
Drink up girl, I don't want you to get arrested!
If it's in the house I'll eventually eat/drink it! It may take me a month or two, so it doesn't taste as good, but I eventually break down..SO, I say drink first, cleanse later!! Just knock'em all back in one sitting! :)
As sad as it sounds, you should cut the those friends loose now. No time like the present time!
Agree to disagree with anyone who cuts out their friends. I for one don't backstab. Especially not margarita and sam when theyve been there for you for such hard times! ;-)
My girlfriend Red and I like to get it on sometimes, but we need to play it cool for the sake of my ass. My ass gets so jealous whenever Red and I spend too much time together that it buddies up with my stomach and tries to get attention by being all Large and In Charge. So annoying.
I say have one last go before you call it quits. Nothing like scraping against a little rock bottom to motivate you :)
PS: I'm sure you're real obese.
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