Thursday, November 11, 2010

Macintosh rocks, for realsies.

I hate looking dumb or sounding dumb but it seems that I sound dumb more and more often. It's like my children have sucked the brains out of my head and grilled it on some kabob stick for the mountain lions up here to consume.

BRAINS ARE GONE.

I hate when I sound dumb or if I spell something wrong but lately, almost every morning (and only in mornings before coffee so maybe I'm not dumb just caffeine deprived?), I say something so wrong, Geoff asks if Yoda is speaking.

Which is why i was kinda afraid to tell him that I'm pretty sure our house got hit by lighting.

Twice.

Also my husband is all serious smart-pants. Really. He has this computer job where he looks at stuff and comes up with answers and when I ask what he is doing he says, "looking for codes" which to me looks like he is staring at the back of a Highlights magazine looking for the pictures that don't belong but I don't see pictures or even words. I see jumbles of meaningless things that are all important and crap and he knows what they are, what they mean and what to do to make the world not explode.

So I didn't want to sound dumb and say lighting struck the house if that means that I sound dumb because maybe if lightning ACTUALLY hits your house, your house catches on fire or something but I DON'T KNOW because I've never had a house that got hit by lighting.

All I know is I was by myself on the couch when it seemed like the air just lit up. Almost like there was a bolt of lightning without the bolt but with light. Ummm, kinda like a strobe light went off for half a second.

And during that there was the sound of radio static in the air.

When I told Geoff that last part he asked, "Where? WHERE did you hear that?"

But there wasn't a "where", it was everywhere. it sounded like static took over the air.

There was thunder too but I never SAW any lighting.

And the internet went out.

I walked into Geoff's office when it happened again, the radio static, the strobe light thing throughout the air. I wanted to turn on his computer to see if anything went wrong. Did lighting REALLY hit our house? I used a pencil with a rubber eraser to actually press the power button because WHO KNOWS where lighting travels through to fry me up like the english muffin I left in the toaster too long last week.

His computer turned on but no internet.

When I told him what happened, he went to fix stuff to only realize that our wireless router was completely fried.

And lighting hitting our house might be the only explanation.

I'm not dumb.

I'm not Yoda.

And since he had reason to go into the Mac store to get the AirPort checked out, he also took in my MacBook that took a big crap several months ago after, I S-word you not, a LIGHTING STORM.

My macbook is about 2 years passed warranty.

We got a BRAND NEW AirPort.
I'm getting a BRAND NEW hard drive and casing.

Because they said, "customer satisfaction".

I love you Mac, I'll never EVER go PC again.

My macey-book gets to come home tomorrow. If it wasn't for the lightning, the poor thing would still be up in my closet sitting next to my Amy Winehouse wig, I'm so excited I could just PEE!

But I'll spare you the pee because like we tell our two year old, "Big boys and girls go in the POTTY."

12 comments:

wonderchris said...

Customer service isn't dead - go MAC!!!

"I S-word you not, a LIGHTING STORM." this was the best line of any blog all week!!!

Might I suggest a coffee IV during your sleep - you'll never Yoda-speak again!! Or should I say - never yoda speak again, you will.

Aurora Sisneros said...

Holy S-word, dude.

That is crazy scary!!!!!

I was driving down Monoco by Stapleton once during a rediculous rainstorm, and I saw that strobe light thing happen outside the car LITERALLY at the same time I heard the LOUDEST crash of thunder EVER in the HISTORY of EVER.

There was a group of poor folks huddled in one of those shelter thingies waiting for the bus, and a few people half-running through the rain, and EVERYONE hit the DECK at the same time.

Time stood still for a minute while everyone checked to make sure they didn't get fried.

Yer a lucky ducky!

Anonymous said...

It never fails! Even when I'm sitting at my desk all alone in this awful room after probably drinking one to many beers last night, You crack me up and change my mood completely! Love it! oh and sorry about the lightning thing... but good call on it! I love it when I'm right and it makes me sound smart!

Courtney said...

i LOVE apple! LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE!

Also, i love this post - I had to bite my lip to not laugh (I'm in class - bad Courtney, bad!)!

Unknown said...

eek! lightning is a crazy thing!
When my husband was on a boat headed for the bahamas for his bachelor party fishing trip, their boat was hit by lightning! He said they didn't hear anything there was just a bright flash and then they COULDN'T hear for a while.
I'm so happy to hear you are alright and that things are working out with the computers -- how wonderful!

Donna @ The House on the Corner said...

I think what you are describing is a visit from extraterrestrials - really (not S-word-ing you!!) When aliens come and visit they simulate a lightening strike so you won't know it's them.

Robin said...

Lightning hit a tree right beside my house once. It traveled directly to the power box and fried and everything. So, I kinda know what you're talking about. We had a burning smell because it literally "fried" everything. I called the fire department because of the smell. Thought something in the attic might be on fire. Turns out no, but it was a relief to know for sure. Lucky you on your new MacBook.

Also wanted to let you know I tagged you on Thursday. Hope you like it!

Cassandra said...

you absolutely crack me up! I passed on a blog award! check out my post today!

MEGandJEFF said...

Um, have i mentioned you freakin' CRACK. ME. UP! I'm peeing my pants here at work..I SO needed to pee my pants at work..oh, wait..hmmm...

On a more serious note, yeah, I think lightning struck your house..twice..isn't that NOT supposed to happen?!

Only to you, my friend, only to you!

Johanna said...

Hilarious! Your husband reminds me of my Ned. You're my new favorite blog:)

Diva's Thoughts said...

I am cracking up over here.

NICKI said...

holy crap, maybe the house IS haunted. You really should get those ghost hunters in before the eggs start frying on the counters without a camera to document them!