Dear Iphone

Dear: Iphone

It is no surprise my husband has an insatiable appetite for anything Macintosh. Did you know that is one little thing that helped kick start our relationship? A love for your products? Thanks for that. Anyway, I believe his love is going to far.

This next story is 100% true.

Geoff and I were trying to find Sears Outlet in search for a decent fridge that didn't cost millions. I was the navigator. I'm not a good navigator.

Me- Okay babe, turn left. Oops, just kidding, U-turn.

Him- Is the compass on your iphone map?

Me- YES, okay, now turn right! Umm, just kidding again, U-turn. This iphone is good, it tells me when I mess up.

Him- It's not on is it?

Me- Yes!

He grabs my phone and turns the compass on.

Me- WOW, now this is REALLY EASY!!!

Him- I knew it wasn't on. You better watch out, this iphone can do a lot, I might even trade you in.

-Sound scratched record.


I get it iphone. You are really pretty.

You are for sure WAY skinnier than I am but curvy in just the right spots. Guys like that, don't they?

You can light up a room.

You know everything!

You can pull recipes out of your butt, give us all the good stock info, play any game, even the stupid ones I make fun of. You don't make fun of stupid games but play along and pretend to enjoy them. Geoff really likes that.

You are WAY smarter than me.

You never forget to remind us when we asked you to.

Speaking of reminders, you never forget a birthday.

You are pretty much perfect and now I hate you for that.

And, damn you, YOU NEVER GET LOST!

I'm not one to get jealous but you better back off my man. I will fight dirty.

Just a little random until I get my head on straight!

I stop moving for two seconds and exhaustion sets in immediately. My schedule is in no way overwhelming, just busy. Busy is fine until you throw in a toddler and I find myself napping for the first time in a long, long, VERY long time. Once again, I'm amazed by the single moms I know. Really, how do you guys do it? How do you carry on from day to day without napping in line at Whole Foods?

My pants are getting loose. I was running to the gym the other day and a pair of pants I bought during a skinny point were falling off. I had to stop and pull them up like a gangster! I'm not complaining, no, I just can't buy clothes right now.

We are in crazy save money mode. Today was the first day we bought food that did not come from a grocery store in weeks. Most days I pack my husbands lunch. We got off coffee. Every dollar counts when you are in love with real estate. Tonight was different, Geoff was napping and I was starving and without hesitating, without letting guilt set in, I ordered Thai. Now I sit here with a heavy stomach and little smirk. I still don't regret it and perhaps tomorrow my pants might stay on.

Sawyer is the most fun thing in history. He is hilarious! He cracks me up every few minutes. The other day he found the cord that plugs the iphone into the computer and thread it through the handle of one of his push toys. He then took each end of the wire (Is it called a wire?), hoisted it over his shoulder, turned around and lugged his push toy around, pulling by the wire. It was the funniest thing, I couldn't bare to take it away. He is my little comedian and I can't believe I got to have him as my son! I'm a lucky mommy!

Speaking of lucky, my husband just changed his diaper without me having to ask. Wow.

Did I also mention my hubby went back to work? Yup, it's true, my husband is employed. Many people have asked me how it's been and the only answer I have is, I MISS HIM! Who knew 8 hours was so long! I miss him more than ever.

Now up for adoption:

The other night I excitedly pointed out the wine fridge/cellar I want to put in the wet bar of the house we pretend is ours already.

Geoff- So, HOW are we going to keep Sawyer and his friends out of that?

Me deflated- oh.

I'll be damned if I let that kid take away my mini wine cellar!

Just Updating!

Yeah, yeah, yeah. I know, I'm not on here much right now. To tell you the truth, I'm not sure why. It wasn't a slow withdraw, it wasn't planned, just one day I stopped. I stopped wanting to write, and even stopped looking at sitemeter. (Yes, I can admit, I loved stats.) I don't remember the last time I looked. Then I was a little too nervous to write anything, didn't have much to say. Why would you want to read? THEN I remembered why I started this blog, to keep family and friends updated from far away lands, aka- not Denver.

So, here I am and here are some updates.

Three words I don't say very often.

Are you ready? (Breath, imagine the words, formulate them, meditate on the meaning, you can do this Holly.)

I. Was. Wrong.

Thanks for all the congrats on the house post. I guess when they approved the price, it wasn't the bank but the owners which means we are still kind of nowhere. We found out they there are two contracts and ours is in the number one position so THAT is good. We did our inspection even though everything can got to crap and we may not get this house but we figured, one- we can inspect it now and lose that money if we don't get the house, or 2- wait until it's closer to ours and pay to dewinterize it and winterize is so doing it NOW actually saves us money later. We chose two. The house is in pretty great condition except the display on the oven and outlets. So, you can heat the over, but you will never know what it's heated to OR more importantly not know the time or how late I'm running. Also the outlets. You know that things that shuts off your blowdryer if you decided to jump in a pool while drying your hair? Yeah, the outlets are missing that. So basically, we can get shocked to death. We were concerned with the foundation but as our inspector put it "This house isn't going anywhere ever. These mountain homes are built on granite. Granite!" I wonder if I can dig some up and replace the counters. He didn't say yes. Oh, he also said, "TLC, wow, this place needs A LOT of love!" A little concerning considering this guy inspects houses all day and our place seemed to need extra special love versus every other house, but hey. We are ready to give it hugs and lovin' all day.

I think I'm getting used to the smell and the dirt int he house because each time I go, I love it more, can breath in my nose and forget about the dead mouse in the dining room or feces on the carpet. Instead I focus on what I want to do with each room. My last visit was to compare two of the basement rooms, I think I decided to switch the play room with the Hill suite and was reminded again how thankful I am for certain people we have in our life and thankful for people that got out of our life as well. Isn't it good to clean up, even in the friend department?

Things lately feel that they are going my way. Several times in the past few weeks I've felt annoyed, like we were going backward, or not forward and getting nervous for the future. I wanted to whine in the corner and stomp my feet a few times. I wanted to get my way, to always get my way.

You appreciate getting what you want more so after not being granted certain things, but you know this.

I'm also on a super health kick and get ready for part 2 of the Dairy is Evil post. It is. Pure evil. Run away now.

The real point is, I love you all! Duh!

me

P.S.- Wooo-hoooo! I just looked up the house online and it's status is no longer active. The sellers agent SAID he was going to mark it 'under contract' but I didn't actually believe him. Everyone better back away from that house, it's OURS (okay, obviously not yet) and we aren't giving it up! BUT, we do like to do dinner parties...

Is it noon yet?

I left girls poker night early last night because I had a super early training session this morning.

She 'rescheduled'.

Went in later this morning to teach a class and end up being filmed for a commercial.

Knew the time was ticking away and had to get to an event I helped plan for the moms club I'm president of. Checked the time, saw five voicemails and had to rush home instead to clean the house before the realtors showed up for an impromptu showing they were calling me about.

I had ten minutes.

I left Sawyer at the gym. They wanted to film him.

I think we are going to be movie stars.

Got back to the gym then rushed to this moms event and got there at the end... when no one was there.

I'm a sucky president.

Ran home, fed and changed Sawyer who has a rash so bad, he can't stand the wipes touching him.

Let him play, outside for a few, got back up to our place to see Sawyer slam his fingers in the door.

Is it noon yet?

Ready, Set, GO!

I've been busy. Being annoying. I'm pretty sure Geoff and I are the most annoying people on real estate buyers planet. Do they have that planet? We should be dropped off on that planet where all realtors who don't want to deal with annoying buyers are NOT. Run, run far away.

Them: It's a short sale, it's going to take a while.

Us five seconds later: Do they have an answer yet?

Us ten seconds later: Do they have an answer NOW?

Us one full (FULL I say!) Mississippi second later: How 'bout now?

Them: NO!

But I heard annoying works. Like you get put back on top of the bank short sale and foreclosure pile and I think it's true. We were told it should be about three months until they get back to us and we heard back this morning.

THIS MORNING!

Let me repeat, we heard back this morning. They countered our offer and said we must pay closing and we are going to accept.

We are wussy fighters. Basically we are telling the banks MERCY!. YOU WIN BANKS! WE are in LOVE with your house, we will do anything, bow at your feet, kiss your ten toes, whisper sweet nothings in your ear!!!

I know this is just the first step in many steps. Maybe the first step in a freaking long marathon race where they spaced out the water stations WAY too far away from each other.

We are going to run it anyway!

Spread the Love

A lot of times it doesn't take much to make someone else smile.

One of my favorite bloggers, Suzy from Hollywood: Where Hot comes to Die wrote a post today referencing my Fire Burns post. One kind gesture she initiated and directed toward someone else. We can all do this. Why don't we all do kind things for others more often? Make someone smile!

Go read her, be her follower, she is great. Then go buy some coffee and a little something yummy and say thanks to your nearest firefighters, they deserve it.

And soon I'll need dentures.

I have no problems admitting I'm dorky. Slow and old. I get it, I'm a mom, my ten year reunion came and went and the things I worry about now are bills and the safety of my family.

BUT, I didn't think I was THAT old or THAT slow until I watched Nick and Norah's Infinite Playlist.

Have you seen this?

No?

Let me explain...

My expectation of the movie: Cute little high school kids, one falls in love with the cute little boy from Juno but cute little boy likes little mean girl. All like music. Funny stuff happens and everything works out in the end.

Boy was I off.

Fist of all THESE KIDS ARE SUPPOSE TO BE IN HIGH SCHOOL doing little high school things!!! High School! Instead you had teener boppers IN HIGH SCHOOL running around in clubs getting super wasted.

I have nothing against getting super wasted... if you are TWENTY FREAKIN' ONE! Obey the law people!

Did I tell you guys I've never had a sip of alcohol until well after I hit my 21st birthday??? See, that was me slow and innocent. I understand that those days are long gone and people under 21 drink... but at clubs where bartenders serve and don't card in New York City? Really? I just don't think so and if it IS so, I don't like it.

So the main girl Norah isn't drinking but she is suppose to be the smart, ugly one who really isn't ugly at all. Norah babysits her wasted off her mind friend who is soooo drunk, she pukes in a toilet then fishes her gum out of said toilet and puts it back in her mouth. Both girls are friends with cute, mean girl who happens to be the ex of the main guy, Nick. Get it, Nick and Norah and their teeny bopper friends.

So mean girl is mean and says to Norah something like, Ohhhh, it's good you are going to college because I hear guys there like brains over beauty.

And Norah is all, I don't care, I have a boyfriend.

And mean girl is all, WHAT, who, where?

And Norah finds some random guy and JUST MAKES OUT WITH HIM!!!

She makes out with some random guy at what, 14 years old? Right there I was shocked.

So later in the movie we find out that everyone in Norah's school makes fun of her because she has never had an orgasm.

WHAT? Again, HOW OLD ARE YOU?

Throughout the movie they are getting into random clubs, bypassing the red velvet rope searching for some band. Nick wonders why whenever he is with Norah he gets special treatment.

Mean girl starts to get jealous and drunk girl is lost, puking in random places.

They find drunk girl, Nick tells mean girl what he thinks by ditching her in some ALLEY in the middle of the CITY (Again, WHAT?! Who does that?) and Norah shows Nick why she is so popular with the bar folk... her daddy owns a recording studio. So, she takes him there... and he is all in awe, and soo they end up on some couch together.

Okay, so picture this,

Two little teenagers on some couch in daddy's recording studio, laying on each other. ON each other. Camera pans out to some sort of recording equipment that lights up when sound is being recorded. You then see the lights going off and HEAR Norah having an ORGASM.

Ummmm?

Are you disturbed yet because I was!

So, they pan back to the kids who have their clothes on. I felt a little relieved that they were dressed but i know what I heard! THEN, they get up, and, are you ready, ZIP UP THEIR PANTS!!!!

I sat there with my jaw to the floor.

Am I that old? THAT out of touch? I understand that kids move a lot faster than I did, and they did so when I was in school and I'm sure move WAY faster now. When I was that age, I wasn't ready for that. I wasn't mature enough. I didn't think some little guy in high school with dreams of getting to Jr. College deserved my innocence but what REALLY shocks me is that all this is a movie, promoted to our teenagers. Promoted as a good time, funny, quirky movie.

After sharing my opinion on this movie, most people didn't understand my shock and disappointment in Hollywood except for one person.

This person said she set a goal for herself this year to not be shy about how she feels towards situations that make her uncomfortable. To emphasize respect and let kids know when she doesn't feel respected.

She'll shout "LANGUAGE!" at kids who are cursing near her and other ladies and usually receives the middle finger. What is wrong with kids today? And how old am I asking 'what is wrong with kids today'?!

Another friend said she saw an older woman walk a teenage looking boy to the door and waved goodbye to him as he walked down the sidewalk lighting up a cigarette.

That isn't okay!

YES people smoked in high school but they hid it from every adult possible and from kids they thought might tell. It wasn't okay then and I don't think it should be accepted now. It was not okay to break the law, do bad things and knew if ANY adult saw them, they would bet that adult would tell their parents.

If I did something like that walking out my door, you can be sure whoever saw me would knock on the door I walked out of asking to speak to the head of the household and inform the parental figures the shenanigans they witnessed. They would be sure an adult in the house would know. Strangers felt responsible for the youth and I didn't grow up in a small town people! What happened to this? Why don't we care? Would you say something to a stranger if you thought their kid was doing something they shouldn't or am I just WAY out of touch?!?!

It's Official

We are beyond obsessed. We want this house. We NEED this house. We keep referring to it as 'OUR house', then stop ourselves and correct... because it's not ours. Or even close. WE still need to sell our condo and I guess only a few places have sold in all of downtown Denver since JANUARY! JANUARY! Isn't that nuts?! I don't know how to make this sell any faster besides dropping the price to a number too low to resist and then we are out money! UGH!

I was thinking about offering anyone that refers someone that actually BUYS our house like five hundred dollars or something, but then realized that is why we have a realtor.

Onto lighter news... Yup, every room is decorated. I've mentally decorated the rooms I said I wasn't going to do it, I was going to be SMART this time. Ahhh, smart is boring anyway. Just when I felt a little stupid for it, I realized my husband mentally fills the tool chest, garage and has already shopped prices on snow tractor remover ride on things. You know, all engine and gears stuff. Guess we are more alike than I thought!

So, want to hear one of my room ideas???

I have all the rooms pretty planned out, what I want to do, what color, what the room will be used for except Sawyer's room. DUH, it will be used for him, but what the hell do I do in there? I was looking up bedding because I think when we move we'll transfer him to a big boy bed (Assuming the moving won't happen for another few months.) and no bedding caught my eye. I was searching Rate My Space on HGTV and no one's room was really doing it for me then it hit me... ROBOTS! Vintage Robots! Actually, Target bedding helped the idea get into my head but whatever. Anyway, how awesome are vintage robots??? Of course I'm on etsy next because I'm ADDICTED to that site, then searching the internet in general for some ideas. Along with a few things below, I'm going to paint a robot on his wall with chalkboard paint and have the robot holding onto a luch box sort of thing, really just a shadow box holding the chalk and eraser. Thoughts, thoughts???



Found here.




Found here.


Found here.


The play room is going to be garden themed kind of like the one below. I'm going to have plastic watering cans (Is that what you call the things you put water in to water your plants?) in bright colors hung over his art table holding the crayons and markers and things. I'm sooo excited and long overdue to decorate!!!


Room here.


P.S. For sitting through this post, you are all invited to my place for dinner and drinks... if we get it... and if you come you have to tell me how great everything looks even if it doesn't look great.... you know, stoke my ego because dang it, I'm feeding you Vodka!

P.S. #2- I have my old iphone up for grabs. My honey upgraded us this weekend after... ready... HE GOT A JOB! So, YAY for him! If anyone wants my old one, let me know, so far no one we know has AT&T and doesn't have an iphone... so it sits here.


Peace, love and chalkboard paint!

me.

Fire Burns

I'm a little annoyed today. I was looking through pictures of the fire damage in California. What used to be lush landscape looks like Mars. Ash. Ash everywhere. To top it off, two firefighters died protecting life and land in a fire that someone most likely started. Two families lost a dad, a husband a son. It makes me really sad. It also hits home and not just because that is where I'm from.

History: When I was in high school, all I wanted to do was become a firefighter. It's what I dreamed of, envisioned, prepared and trained for. I joined the explorer program in L.A. County and shockingly was good at what I wanted to do. I was the only female but I worked hard, REALLY hard to keep up with the boys. THen I worked HARDER to show them up. I didn't want pity, didn't want things easier. If I was going to do this, I was going to do it well to a man's standards. It was difficult and stressful and one of the most amazing times of my life. I was sent to an academy and worked harder than I ever had in my life. I was rewarded with several awards. I studied, could do pushups from night until morning. Survived on little sleep as they rang bells from night until morning ensuring that under stress and fatigue, we could still think straight, perform strong. That academy had a 50% drop out rate and I graduated. I graduated one of the toughest academies. A few years later we found out the explorer (AKA- Volunteer) academies were more difficult and stressful than the paid and made sure someone was there to watch over the firefighters who led these. I became an EMT and rode along 24hour shifts on the engine. I recovered severed arms, performed CPR, gave oxygen, bandaged gaping wounds, triaged in cases of major accidents. I fought little fire, but trained like the big one was coming any day and we all waited. We waited for the big one, because that is where the fun began, right?



Long story short, I almost got hired with a department I didn't want to work for, and decided to go have fun until County called my name. I wanted to be an L. A. County Firefighter.



That time never came. I got caught up on fun and traveling. I realized that the work I put in to constantly prove myself was exhausting and I didn't want to walk into work EVERYDAY and feel like I had to prove myself all over again. Every single day for a female was a day of proving you can hang. And, if you are as good as the next guy, it doesn't matter, you have to be better. I was tired. I guess I didn't have it in me after all.

But many of my friends did. They ARE L.A. County firefighters. They are L.A. City firefighters. They work for forest service. They are fire detectives. They are EMT's and Paramedics and I'm so proud of them. But two of those heroes lost their life in a fire that someone may have started. One, Arnie, was an Explorer in the post I was. He was a few years ahead of me and my friend was his leader and years later, that same friend sees Arnie's body while working on the triage and body recovery team in THIS last fire. Arnie leaves behind his pregnant wife due in the next few weeks. Wow. This shouldn't have happened. No one should have to see that. But these firefighters work harder than most can imagine to train for such emergencies, knowing that their life is on the line while doing so. They do it to protect YOU to ensure YOUR house doesn't burn to the ground to ensure YOU go about your day not fearing that everything you know may end in smoke and ash. They watch their own friend's life come to an end so yours does not.

If you wold like to make a donation to their family or memorial fund, please go here.

The Last Supper

Confession: I have a new obsession.

Elk antler chandeliers.

I know right? WHERE THE HELL DID THAT COME FROM?!?!

We are back to looking at houses. We are, we are. I'm a little less spastic. A little less 'OMG IF I DON'T GET THIS HOUSE I MAY DROP OVER DEAD!' Isn't that sooo good for me?!

Here is the thing, our condo has been on the market for a while ( Anyone? Anyone?) and Geoff has been out of a job but thank freaking everything, he had a little interview yesterday. So, we were on the hunt.

And we found one.

And we put in a bid.

And I heart it with my beating bloody muscle of a heart.

But just when I THOUGHT I wasn't going to go crazy or mentally decorate each room or mentally pick out the furniture and paint colors and scour HGTV's Rate my Space page for rooms I want to copy, I got worse.

I became obsessed with finding the perfect chandelier for our new dining room. Our dining room in the house in the mountains.


(Found here)

Did you hear that? I said 'our' like it's ours already BUT check it out!

Do you like it? Do you like it? Too bad for me because that one cost like a gazillion dollars and I don't make that much money teaching aerobics.

So, I've been scouring Ebay and found a few I like and almost put in a bid... until I realized we DIDN'T have the house (yet) and WHAT would I do with the thing? Where would I hang it?

It would make a great entry way piece here except our ceiling is too low and it would cause severe puncture wounds to anyone that walked in our door. That isn't a very welcoming welcome.

I thought over our current dining room table but again the whole ceiling height thing stands in the way. It would look like an exaggerated thorn crown over the heads of all our dinner guests. We would all look like really uncomfortable eating and drinking Jesus'.

We could hang it above our bed but then again where would we sleep?

I didn't purchase the chandelier and am thinking I should stick to diaper bags.


ALSO'S

Also- I think butter taste weird.
Also- I've been busy and am now catching up with your blogs. Please forgive my tartiness!
Also- My husband said I really needed to get my hair done. When my husband points it out, how bad is it really? I'm assuming at this point people stand on the street, point and laugh.
Also- I'm so over sweet things. It's official. Give me dolmas over chocolate any day!
Also- We have a little video of our dream house here... it's a little long and keep in mind it's suppose to foreclose today and the owners just destroyed it. WE are just the right family it needs to receive the lovin' it deserves...
Also- I love you guys!!!!!!!
Also- I'm not sure if that video tag will work since it's on facebook but whatev, thought I would try.
Also- I'm really dorky in it, be forewarned...