Monday, May 10, 2010

This is no Cinderella Story

I was going to write you guys about this house and how we don't ever see bugs, and everyone warned us of mountain living and how you will see all sorts of crawly, creepy critters and I was like, IN YOUR FACE SUCKAHS. I mean, we saw two stink bug/beetle things and of course Geoff picked them up and threw them outside alive. Then we saw them again and he was like, "How are they getting in here?' Umm, because you pick them up lovingly and place them right outside our door. SMASH THEIR BRAINS OUT!

Then Saturday night, I'm using the bathroom, like I do a hundred times a night and what comes out to greet me?

A mouse.

A MOUSE!

I told you guys I was going to see them, remember? UGH, I tried not to freak, and the thing just looks at me, like, "Heyyyy gurl, how's it hangin'?"

And I was like, silently FREAKING!

So, the mouse runs back into the linen closet thing across from the toilet then back out to check on me, you know, make sure it's all coming out okay and then runs into our walk in closet.

It's like 3am and I don't know what to do and I don't want to wake Geoff because if he cares, he should get some sleep but most likely he won't and sleep anyway.

I on the other hand can not get to sleep. I imagine him crawling into our bed and making a nest in my hair.

I imagine me stepping on him barefoot in the middle of the night and poop squirting everywhere. I'm not sure why.

I imagine him pooping on all the floors I've cleaned over and over again on my hands and knees. He must die horribly.

At one point I remember dreaming about an airport and I as I woke to the sun rising and Sawyer screaming, I was happy I got a nap but the evil mouse eyes plotting my downfall was the only thing in my mind.

I head across our living room to get Sawyer and I see a mouse run from the fireplace, under the couch right toward my feet. I'm screaming and trying to lift myself onto furniture totally forgetting that I'm 30 pounds heavier and my body doesn't get off the ground like it used to. In fact, it didn't get off the ground one inch.

"A mouse, it's a mouse! It's heading right for me, help! Ahhhhh!!!!!!!"

Geoff gets up and closes the door so he can't hear my screaming. So heroic.

The mouse darts into the kitchen and I grab Sawyer and step back into the living room.

My heart is beating and Sawyer is saying, "Food! Food! Please, food!"

Child, do you know what is in the kitchen? Food is the LAST thing you are getting right now.

I'm still freaking out and I think I hear Geoff snoring. I sit in the dining room table and google Lowes to see what type of death traps they have and wonder if anyone there will be offended if I stop by 'as is', without my teeth brushed and some mismatched pajamas. This mouse must die. This mouse must die.

Lowes doesn't open for two hours. Sawyer REALLY is wanting food and I don't think I can function and WHY does Lowes not open at 6am every day?

I tip toe into the kitchen and grab him cereal and milk.

No mouse.

Breathe Holly, breathe.

Knowing I can't let this guy go free for another two hours, I put together my own mouse trap, a toilet paper roll, a piece of cardboard on a ramp and an empty waste basket. I put some peanut butter on the toilet paper roll and balance it just so hoping the mouse will run up the ramp, be enticed into the peanut butter tunnel and when he gets to the treat, topple along with the toilet paper roll into the trash can.

I have no daggers to paste at the bottom of the trashcan. It's like the nicest mouse trap ever, the last thing I had in mind was nice, but whatever.

We get dressed and I head to a grocery store instead of Lowes because this opens before 8am. Screw Lowes, where are they when you really need them.

Men are filing out of this store one by one with fresh flowers for their mommy wives.

My husband shut the door so he couldn't hear my death screams and could sleep in.

AND there is a mouse in the house.

Ugh, Happy Mother's Day to me.


But, who wants to see some pictures?!?!

The day we moved in:




Nursery is in progress now.




Of course it snows the weekend we move in.

We still have a lot to do, mostly painting and replacing hardware so here are some just settling in pictures but not really "afters" just yet.






When I get a free week, the cabinets are getting a creamy white makeover.


This is the bedding I sewed. It still needs to be ironed but I was too excited to see what it looked like in a crib. (A crib I set up all by myself in a room I painted all by myself... just thought I would add that part in.)


More detailed pictures to come as we slowly get things checked off our list. I can't believe how much work a house is! Hope you all had a critter free Mother's Day!

Love youuuuuu all!

me

16 comments:

wonderchris said...

You are so brave! I'm a fan of Mickey Mouse, but that's about it.

Furry Bottoms said...

When a house is left empty forever like this one, little critters find their way in and make themselves at home. It'll take a while to get it all up and secure!

I can see why you held on for so long... for this particular house. It is GORGEOUS!! That fireplace sold me immediately.

Aurora Sisneros said...

Bedding is AWESOME!!! Nice work!

A few days after Christmas one year, in our old house (in downtown Denver, nonetheless), we were watching TV, and I SWEAR I saw a stocking MOVING. Turns out, a mouse was in there eating all my chocolate! JERK!!!

MotherEarth said...

OMG! You are brave! I have a phobia with mice....I would've gave up and went running for the hills! haha! Your house is amazingly beautiful though! Nice job :) Good luck with the rodent problem...

MEGandJEFF said...

oh my goodness the house is GORGEOUS!!! I luuuurve it!

I do not, however, love mice..I have SOOO many mouse stories..like the one that crawled in bed with me & I rolled on it in my sleep & woke up to squished mouse!

Or the time my dad taught me how to shoot at mice w/ a BB gun (because he, too, believes in violent mouse deaths!) & I shot off a mouse's leg in my attempts (animal rights activists keep your mouths shut..I was 10) & it freaked out, made a mad dash for my little bro & bit his finger!!

or, or, OR...I'll stop there :)

I hope your vermin problem gets resolved soon..you should get some cats & let them be outdoor kitties..my parents live in the middle of a field & this is what they've done..never see any mice!!

Holy long comment!

Happy Mom's Day!

Unknown said...

MEG: You rolled over on a mouse?! I would of died! I would of gone into labor and DIED! I take some sort of relief in my thoughts that they wouldn't climb on my bed. Great, now I'm NEVER going to sleep again!

Aurora: The thing was eating your chocolate? What a bastard! How did he get in there? Mice are so sneaky!

Anonymous said...

omg i would have FREAKED! Love the house though!! minus all the rodents... ugh... i made my dad inspect my room for spiders at our beach house before i would even go in there! I would never survive.

Anonymous said...

Hie-hie you are so funny. Yey me for discovering your blog!

And, the house looks awesome!

jessikahsd said...

Holly your house is so beautiful! If I were a mouse, I would want to move in there too. ;) Congrats again (on the house, not the mouse).

SurferWife said...

Ooooh! The picture of your house are gorgeous!!!

And yeah, we tend to have a rat or two visit every now and again. And it is the grossest thing EVER.

Nishant said...

Bedding is AWESOME!
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SweetPeaSurry said...

1st: I wanna come live with you ... mice and all. That house is AWESOME!

2nd: That bedding you made? EVEN AWESOMER!!!

3rd: I got this thing online that emits high pitched squeals or something through the walls, gets rid of all kinds of creatures and you just plug it into an outlet, if I can find it again, I'll send you the link.

Namaste!

Stacey-Lou said...

you're a great writer. very witty!
your new house is absolutely GORGEOUS! can't wait to read more x

Robin said...

Hi There..I got to you from friend connect...there must be a missing letter or something in the email one..any way..OMG..this is it...Awesome Girlfriend...really really great...not the mouse though...Ewww..thats Ok though ..there wont be any more..I hope..The crib and the bedding are gorgeous...and so is the crib you built, and the room you painted...you are a very resourceful and self sufficient lady/mommy...I love that kind a woman...im like that too..hubs doesnt really like it too much...he wants to be needed..ya know..Good luck with everything...Its really beautiful.!

Unknown said...

First, I hate mice. Give me spiders, give me bugs but do not ever give me mice.

But your house? I LOVE it. Give me that deck ANYDAY!

NICKI said...

You house is beautiful! When we moved in, we found a frozen mole on the attic stairs. And we haven't seen rodentia since! So maybe this was a fluke :)